By Mader W.
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They are not, of course, sanctified by any religious or legal contract, nor are there similar obstacles to their dissolution; in a society where concealment of one's homosexuality can be important it is far easier to manage a series of "one-night stands" than a lasting relationship. ) They are not held together by children, and the partners are less likely to be financially dependent upon each other than in a heterosexual relationship. Yet they survive, and perhaps the very obstacles to such partnerships can become strengths, for homosexual relationships are an existential assertion less easily corrupted by convenience and conformity than straight ones.
Like Stephen, coming out for me brought the great relief of discovering others who shared that sense of being an outsider. Whether this sense of separateness is the product of social pressures alone, or of something beyond them might be questioned; as with many homosexuals I am likely to argue at different times and on different occasions either that there is something inherently special about us, inseparable from our homosexual orientation, or that whatever that special thing is, it results entirely from social oppression.
Mailer uses the word "choose" which would be rejected by both biological and psychiatric determinists, and indeed probably by most homosexuals. "I can't help what I am" is a frequent comment in homosexual conversation. I suspect this is less true than the orthodox wisdom suggests, and that there is at least sometimes an element of deliberate choice in the adoption of homosexuality. Robert Lindner in his book Must You Conform? refers to homosexuality as "a form of rebellion" and the homosexual as a "non-conformist' and there is some truth in this.